Total Shit

ok...i was thinkin since quite a long time abt wat was wrong with me. and i just found out k im quite abnormal...when im sad or down, i want to b alone....just to b with myself....always thinkin k chalo koi dekh nahi raha ho ga tu main b thora sa roo ker dekh lun gi....per everytime i do this, i end up with even more frustration and depression...God...i have got this extreme excess of the hormone or watever that gives rise to the urge to cry....but on the contrary, i have got this extreme lack of the hormone that produces ur tears!


wat can i person do in such a situation....i have always thought that crying is just a symbol of weakness....but first time in my life, its happenin that i want to cry....per i just cant....


im really tired of everything now....i keep on comparin myself with hellota succesful ppl around me...pata nahi y i cudnt get anything i wished for....


khair...bunda kiya ker sukta hay.....sub kuch Allah k hathon main hay....and im happy that im a Muslim....at least i have got two things to satisfy myself no matter wat happens....first, Allah behter keray ga and second and second, issi main Allah ki koi behtri ho gi...!!


haaahhhh.....anyways....jo kismat ko manzoor....i have tried and im still trying....and if i dun get sumthing i think i desire....then just forget it....i have no interest iin this life anymore....


jub kisi ko iss say koi mutlub nahi k im gettin hurt, tu mujhe kisi kuttay nay kata hay k main dosroon ki fiker main upna khoon jalaon...huh...fuck it...


BYE...